You Gotta Be Bad...Like Jesus

I fell in love with Jesus “the-revolutionary-rebel” when I fourteen, in the presence of a bunch of bullies while going to school in a jail. Cause that’s where you go when you make a mistake at school as a kid. Thanks to the “zero-tolerance policy”, I got thrown in the ranks of all the bad kids. I wish I could say this only happened once.

Freshman year of high school, me and a friend (a straight A honor student) had some beer in the car at a football game. We were only on the property for a minute to pick up another friend, but a rat snitched on us and we both got expelled.

They sent us to school at the Williamson County Jail.

It was a blessing for me to witness in hindsight, but it was hell to walk through, as I was also one of the bad kids.

Sort of.

I had a mad crush on Jesus and I toted my bible to class everyday to fantasize about a revolution. No joke. I wasn’t the popular kid.

If only my haters knew what a rebel he was (and that he wasn’t white).

I saw Jesus as the biggest badass to have ever lived! He was so passionate and he spoke the truth of transcendence! He preached about our own personal channel to The Spirit! He went on and on about our ability to be healed by our faith! And he performed oh. so. many. miracles! Swooon.

But empowering people was not popular at the time. He was a threat to the status quo.


He didn’t die for your sins, hate to say. He died because he told you that you didn’t have sins! That you were already forgiven. And that you were powerful in your own bloody right because you came from where he came from! He was waking people up from their long cozy slumbers. Rather, He made the blind people see.

The money changers and powers-that-be didn’t like that too much so his story was made into one that was all about His death instead of all about His life and His underground teachings.

For 100s of years after his death, the only people who had possession of any bible were the kings, who wrote it as they saw fit. You could be killed if you were found with one.

See, Jesus reveled secrets, like forgiveness, that could actually heal the world and make kings and government unnecessary.

His way did not believe it blasphemy to consider oneself equal to GOD! (Read that again) In fact, that was necessary in order to be healed. You had to believe. While all the time recognizing that it is not “I”, the man, the ego. It is “I” The Spirit, The Father, that is within that does all the working.

For years, my childhood journey felt like one of perpetual heartbreak as I rode the ups and downs of being “the bad kid”.

My mother and I had a theme song that we sang everyday on the way to one of the “Alternative Learning Centers” I attended because of suspension. The chorus goes like this:

“You gotta be bad. You gotta be bold. You gotta be wiser. You gotta be hard. You gotta be tough. You gotta be stronger. You gotta be cool. You gotta be calm. You gotta stay together. All I know, all I know, love will save the day. “

How I yearned to see miracles! The healing of the un-healable! Faith with works! Freedom to be bold enough to follow the Law of Spirit and Intuition above The Law of Man!!

“For I say to you, that unless your righteousness surpasses that of the scribes and Pharisees, you shall not enter the kingdom of heaven.” – Matthew 5:20

I spent a lot of years in the trenches with the rebels of society. When I was 18, I took up refuge at The Muse, a music club/coffee shop in a shady corner of downtown. For a year, I lived among the homeless, and others that society pissed on and left to dry like earthworms.

Some of them were straight up fucking crazy. In and out of jail and the porn store next door. They had absorbed their “bad” labels that were slapped on them growing up. They’ve been living that story their whole life.

Under it all though, they weren’t bad. They were just severely misunderstood. They’d been pushed out the way. Their anger seemed justified. Like a rat in a cage. I could see their inner child in them cowering like pitiful puppies, while on the outside, full of rabid rage.

If only these unfortunate ones had equated “bad” with “righteous-rebel” when they were younger! What if they were able to have had a leader who displayed that the highest form of rebellion is to consider your own authority, your own voice, and your own faith before simply going along with the those that want to keep you in line with one finger over your mouth?

What if they knew they were being primed to be soldiers in the march against the man!? Maybe they wouldn’t have given up so easily. Maybe they would have found their purpose in bucking the system instead of just bucking themselves.

The other people I got to know through my most trivial years were ones that had “found themselves” and/or a God. Or at least a belief in something that feels more real than what our eyes call reality. They were spiritual people. They were artists, musicians, poets, people who channeled their pain through creative centers and carried on that way. Usually, their missions were to heal the world, themselves, or at least find meaning in it all..I understood why Jesus kept this sort of company.

Because they weren’t ruined by drinking America’s Kool-Aid, either as a cattle in the herd, or the bull tied up in chains, they escaped The Matrix and became free thinkers.

Fast forward several years of injustices later…

I still feel surrounded by a world full of bullies, but these aren’t the same kind as the “bad” kids. These were the good ones back then. Their lives were normal. The bad seeds were plucked out of their way to prime their path for the American Dream:

Society appears to be crumbling, but it’s really just the earth shaking from more people waking up. All of the sudden, it appears that there are a lot of us! Like a whole uprising of citizens that don’t belong to a party or a religion, but we are awake.

Times may seem shaky now, but I tell you that a New Age is at dawn. Things may get crazy first, but I tell you that with all darkness, there is much more light.

Here’s to the rebels for freedom and love!

“You are a light of the world.

A city set on a hill cannot be hidden.

Men do not light a lamp and place it under the peck-measure, but on the lamp-stand;

and it gives light to all who are in the house.

Let your light shine before men in such a way that they may see your good works

and glorify your Father.”

~ Matthew 5:14-16

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